Dealing With Depression

At first I tried to ignore all feelings. Kept myself busy with work, tasks.. I went about my daily life in a daze. Void of all feelings, like a zombie. I was lost.

However there were still times when I was alone. Mentally, my thoughts began: Am I not worthy? Do I look so bad? Why, despite all my sincere efforts, I always fail? Emotionally, the feelings came: I felt lousy, VERY LOUSY. My eyes start to swell, I can't see clearly.

I have reached depression. I started to cry. Physically, there are strange uncomfortable feelings in my heart. Sad, I only have sad thoughts, I feel sad, I look sad, I AM SAD. I remember from TV, experts say: "You need to visit & revisit your pain again & again until you can accept it. Don't fight it, don't deny it. Feel the full force of the pain, then only you can move on. Then you can begin to heal."

Yes, I can feel the pain but I don't know if it is the full force.
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Can I accept it?
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Whatever that does not break me, makes me stronger.
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Meanwhile, my self-therapy continues...